umbrella etiquette

I am an Oregonian. I have never owned an umbrella. (that may be a lie... I may have owned an umbrella in the first grade, but only because it was bought for me, and only because it had Strawberry Shortcake on it). So I'll change my intro...

I am an Oregonian. I have never bought an umbrella. I have never used an umbrella. I don't mind getting wet. I'd rather get wet than have an umbrella turn inside out in the wind. I'd rather get wet than poke an innocent person's eye out.

We went to the Farmer's market on Saturday. It was raining. Rather it was borderline POURING. I had a hoodie on, I was fine. What I was not fine with were the many people who carried umbrellas and had no clue that they would run into me. Poke me. Nearly take out an eye (thank goodness for my glasses). WHY don't people realize that when using an umbrella, they take up more space! I don't get it. I could ALMOST tolerate the six year old twirlling his umbrella, spraying water everywhere... but, I will admit I grabbed the umbrella to stop the added water spray.

I hate umbrellas. Get wet, we aren't made of sugar!

Betty Crocker watch out!

Everyone knows, Lucas is the chef of the family. He loves to cook, and he's VERY good. I'm quite spoiled to have such a husband. But MAYBE I'll be the baker of the family.

We took a road trip around Mt. Hood on Saturday. It was a lovely drive, and there is a section called "the fruit loop". Multiple orchards and yummy farms to stop at and buy goodies. We found some of the most delicious apples there. So, of course we bought a lot. We bought extra for our friend Dave who makes great apple pie.

Here I light bulb went off... why can't I make an apple pie? I've never made one, never made homemade crust... maybe this was the perfect opportunity.

I pulled out the "Oshel Family Recipe Book" my mom made for us... French apple pie. (I thought it was Dutch apple pie, but what do I know... I am not Betty Crocker.) I also found the crust recipe. If I was going to do this, I would do it full heartedly... not "cheat" and buy a premade crust.

First I tore the kitchen apart looking for our pie pan. I knew we had one somewhere, a wedding gift from four years ago... but where would I have hidden it. We are chefs, not bakers in this household. Of course, it would be in with the cutting boards.

I then made the crust. I created a nice floury mess... but rolled it out nicely and placed it into the pie plate. (Unfortunately I did not have enough to make the yummy cinnamon treats mom used to make... another day.)

I then took to the apples. Peeled, cut, and sliced them to perfection. Except for one thumb wound, all went well... Which reminded me... I need to buy band-aids.

I piled the apples high into the pie. I covered them with the yummy crumbles that make French apple pie French apple pie.

Into the oven it went. I patiently waited for 50 minutes. OK, I looked at it every five minutes through the little window, watching it turn golden and bubble to perfection. I admit, I talked to it too. If people talk to their plants, I will talk to my pie.

FINALLY it came out, beautiful... but again we had to be patient. If you cut pie too soon, it will fall apart... if you wait you will be rewarded. So, we waited, and waited and waited. Staring at this beautiful pie.

The wait was worth it. It came out in a perfect pie shape. I braced myself for the first bite. Better than I even imagined. The apples still had a little texture ( I hate mushy apples) the crumbly top was sweet, the gooey insides were cinnamon and sugar. It was the best pie I've ever had.

If I can't have chocolate (still unappetizing) at least I can have apple pie. Fresh apple pie, straight from my oven.

Mom told me I was already nesting... I disagree... I think I just wanted a slice of heaven!

a few firsts

Well, pregnancy has definitely given me my share of "firsts", here are a few...

• My first food aversion: I hate chocolate. The smell, the taste, even the thought of makes me nauseous. Buying Halloween candy was difficult... and there's about 10 leftover pieces sitting in the kitchen, just staring at me... taunting me. I may actually have to throw them away. Sure, it makes me sad, I've always loved chocolate... but maybe it's a good thing... it's not THAT good for you.
• My first food craving: KFC. I can't remember the last time I ate at KFC, let alone crave it. And I didn't just crave the mashed potatoes and gravy... no, I craved the 11 secret special spices. No fears, I didn't eat it off the bone, something that still grosses me out... but the chicken strips... they were so tasty. I didn't even use the ranch dressing provided...
  
• My first vomit: I ate a graham cracker. It seemed so innocent. It tasted so good. And it did, going down. I puked so hard to get every crumb of that graham cracker out of my body, I actually got bruising around my eyes... it makes me very thankful that I'm nauseous all the time, but don't actually vomit. (sorry Jill)
• My first ultrasound: We had our first doctor's appointment on Halloween. Everything went great... we got to see the little bugger's heartbeat. It was very cool. As Lucas put it: "I've seen cool things all around the world, but that was by far the neatest thing I've ever seen."
  

Wii

Lucas punched me last night. He actually knocked me out... twice.

We were playing our new Nintendo Wii. We boxed. I don't think that I've ever boxed before, and it shows. My punches are weak, my aim inaccurate, my dodging skills are definitely lacking. But, my arms hurt today. So does my tennis elbow. Real life tennis need hand-eye coordination, something I've never been that great with. You need it with Wii Tennis too. Though occasionally I do win at Tennis. Golf on the other hand, I think I have a natural talent for... my follow through is grand!

I must go practice my boxing. I think I might need to buy some Gatorade!

Big News

Here we are in Prague. We became VERY good at "self-portrait" pictures... who knows maybe one will make a Holiday Card!

And here's the big news: We're PREGNANT!! We started telling everyone this weekend. And it's made Suzi's blog, so I figured I better put it on mine too! I decided not to post the picture of the pregnancy test... yes we took one (or maybe 2). We found out in Prague. What a great souvenir. We are assuming we are about 6-8 weeks along. Hopefully I'll have a doctor's visit in the upcoming week.

FINALLY I'll have something to blog about on a regular basis... no longer do I have to wait for random and odd things to happen in life... now I can just write about this! (I knew I started a blog for a reason!)

I'm back...

What a wonderful trip! It was worth the 24 hour travel time. We had a lot of fun in Prague, Vienna and Budapest. I'm currently downloading my 250 pictures (not an exaggeration).

Here are a few things I've missed while I was away:

• Milk
• conditioner (I didn't pack shampoo or conditioner for space reasons, hotels only give you crappy non-sudsing shampoo... OH how my hair loved the conditioner last night)
• drinkable tap water.
• Not having to pay for water at restraurants. (paying 3 dollars for .3l of icky mineral water)
• Being able to read signs for directions
• Eavesdropping on ENGLISH conversations!
• Of course, family and friends.

We are off to the farmer's market... once my pictures are ready, I'll try (again) to post a picture or two... promise not the 250! Those you'll have to wait for the album for!

while I'm gone

I'm living in a grand state of denial/procrastination. I leave for Europe, let's call it my P.V.B. tour (Prague, Vienna, Budapest), in less that 48 hours. I have MUCH to do, including throwing a baby shower this afternoon. I'm actually making a list of things I need to do (I never make lists), and including such menial things as : take a shower, feed cats, by gum.

But as I'm SURE everything will get done. I also enjoy good procrastination. So, I thought that while I'm gone, I should maybe state some of my favorite games to play on the Internet, so you too can delay work, sleep, and/or productive time.

At work when there's "down time", which didn't happen at ALL last night, I frequent yahoo games. here's where I think you should go.

• For fun word games try: Text Twist, Spellbound, or Crossword
• For puzzle games try: Rocket Mania or Be Trapped (very similar to minesweeper)
• For card games, my new favorite is: Addiction Solitaire (and it IS)

OK, that's a start, all these games don't require evil downloading, and are all great ways to waste hours of time.

Humbling comment

Lucas and I were walking with my niece Abigail this weekend. This was a conversation that was definitely humbling for me.

Lucas: Abigail, are you going to be taller than Marla when you grow up?
Abigail: No, (dramatic pause) but I'm going to be smarter.

You can't fault her, she's only four and a half, and she is VERY smart already. It wouldn't surprise me in the slightest if she were right.

Monopoly Madness

I LOVE games. Any game will do, cards, board, computer, strategy, logic, luck, chance... I LOVE THEM! I can spend entire weekends in Seattle playing Canasta or Scrabble. Long weekends in Salem playing so many games of Pinochle I don't remember the sun setting. I'll play "memory match" with my niece, I'll even let her win if it means I can play another round!

On the other hand, it's no secret, Lucas HATES games. He'll play them, he's even good at them, but he hates them. I'll get him to play Boggle when we're camping, and we'll play "battle" ( our version of war, with only half a deck) but besides that, he hates them.

I knew this when I married him, really I think it's his only downfall. I grew up with an entire closet devoted to games, weekends full of games, chocolate milk and nacho cheese Doritoes. He grew up never even playing Go Fish.

When we first got married, I tried to make him play Monopoly. He made it around the board twice, before he declared it "stupid" and walked away. This weekend in Boise was another story. During nap time, Suzi, Nathanael, and Us played a game of Monopoly. (I think it was even Lucas' idea, maybe it's something in the Boise air, or that he secretly liked playing "Guess Who?") It was overall a short game. Maybe two hours. At the end of the hours, Lucas won. No one let him win either, he won fair and square... and I think he's still riding on the andrenaline of winning.

There's nothing like winning a game of Monopoly... investing the time, squeezing money out of other players, building the little red hotels. By the time the game was through, Lucas had Hotels from St. James to Pennsylvania... the oranges, reds, yellows, AND greens! He was my own Donald Trump. He won, and with that MAYBE I did two a little bit... MAYBE now he'll play more games with me... I won't bet Boardwalk on it... but maybe he'll dream of little green houses or the glorious victory.

You know you're at Emanuel when...

I've been working a lot recently. For those who don't know, I work at Emanuel Hospital. It's the "ghetto" hospital of Portland. There are occasional shootings (yes with guns) in the park across the street. Frequently our Emergency room gets "locked down" because of violence. I don't work with trauma patients. I work with the medical ones. I love my job. As one of our supervisors say... "you can't make this stuff up"

So, here's a few "you know you're at Emanuel when..."

• instead of a driver's license, your patient has a prison ID card
• your patient signs out AMA (against medical advice) at 0100, so she can still make it to her 0200 drug deal.
• you find money in body orifices.
• someone can be talking with you with a blood alcohol level of .3 (any of us would be PASSED OUT bordering on needing a breathing machine).
• your patient, who has no lower legs, signs out AMA and crawls out the front door.
• you can have urine, blood, poop and vomit on the floor of a patient's room, and not even flinch.

If nothing else, I always get good stories with being a nurse at Emanuel!

not a boy scout

My dad is an eagle scout... he is always prepared... that's the motto, be prepared. I proved this weekend that I am NOT a boy scout, or even a girl scout... I was not prepared.

Lucas and I went camping this weekend with our friends Patti and Dan. We went to Cape Lookout State Park, outside of Tillamook. Even though I grew up in Tillamook, I don't think that I've ever camped at this park. But that's not the point of this story. It was a beautiful day, clear skies, even warm for the Oregon coast.

We packed what we felt we needed, but in our defense, we packed quickly. We had woken up early to drive to the Portland Farmer's market for Biscuits and Gravy. I don't like Biscuits and Gravy, Lucas swears this vendor had the BEST B & G around. I had a tasty biscuit sandwich, but I digress again. We hurried home and packed quickly...

Patti and Dan had mentioned a hike... luckily I did pack our hiking boots. What we didn't pack was water, sunscreen or snacks. It was a 5 mile, beautiful hike out to the point of Cape Lookout. It was a lovely view. We were thirsty. We were hungry. Luckily Patti brought two bottles of water and shared. She also shared some tasty trail mix, which I don't think I've actually ever eaten on a trail.

Then we went to the camp site, set up camp. As the night progressed, it got cold. Somehow I thought we were still summer camping (it's the beginning of September) and I did not pack enough clothes. We also didn't pack our flashlights (again Dan to the rescue with a head lamp for us to borrow) As I snuggled into my mummy sleeping bag, with not enough clothes, Lucas without socks, we thought WHY DIDN'T WE PACK WARMER CLOTHES! It made me think of an opening game I went to a few years back with Jill... how we FROZE watching the Mariners... FROZE (a mistake we've never repeated) But, that's just another tangent for another time...

In the morning we emerged from our tents, barely rested, still frozen. Patti and Dan emerged with warm layers, two flashlights and good sleep... They went off to do a morning hike, we packed up to drive home and sleep.

Maybe they are the scouts Lucas and I aren't.

dingleberries and boars

It's 0200. I am at work. We were just talking about what patients have either called us, or threatened us with. The things that come out of a 93 year old woman's mouth that make you gasp, and then bust up laughing... laughing makes them more mad. So, here is a small list of quotes that have stood out.



PARENTAL WARNING: the following list may contain words that are offensive, images that are unable to be removed from your fragile brain or phrases even a sailor wouldn't have thought of.

• "what kind of people raised you"
• "you shit-cock" (from a 93 year old lady's mouth)
• "you giving my potassium... good, 'cause it gives me a hard on" (EEW!)
• "when you came into the room, I thought you were going to be a real bitch... and I was right"
• "you're as worthless as tit's on a boar"
• "I'll cut off your tally-wacker and hang you by your dingleberries" (told to a male nurse)
• and my personal favorite ever said to me: "suck my dick you fucking fart" (I love the use of the word fart)

There's more... there's always more... more stories, more laughs. And it's only with laughter can you get through an occasional 12 hour shift with this type of abuse. But really, what other job can you hear this stuff... and not make it up!

Tea and Norman

Lucas and I love going out for tea. More specifically, we enjoy going to the 24hour coffee shop at 0200 and drinking tea. Usually it's nice and relaxing. Honestly, there's very few things that are more relaxing: drinking nice warm tea and reading a good book with someone you love.


This is unless your tea party is crashed by a 4 inch, green praying mantis. Picture it: I was sitting outside, a nice warm summer's eve. Drinking a nice orange herbal tea, reading about Prague. Then... out of no where, I actually HEAR the bug land. THWOMP. I glanced over and there on the table, only inches from my teacup, is a 4 inch (not exaggerating) praying mantis (aka scary looking bug).

I almost screamed like a girl. I think I heard Lucas muffle his fright. We stood up. Staring at our unwelcomed visitor. He seemed harmless enough. Maybe he was just lonely looking for companionship. But I think deep down, he wanted to eat us.

At first we tried to ignore it. Trying to read our books, but watching him out of the corner of our eyes, just in case an attack was near. Then we tried to appreciate it, "look how it moves its head around" (trying to figure out who was going to be tastier). We couldn't kill it... WAY to big. And what if it had back up... Finally after 10 minutes, we decided to leave. We took our tea and left our table to Norman the Praying Mantis. Maybe the next couple drinking tea at his table would be better companions for him.

Flight of the Conchords

I am in love. I should say, both Lucas and I are in love. We are in love with with Jemain and Bret. They are Flight of the Conchords.

OK, it's an HBO show. ANYONE with cable should watch this show. Seriously, watch it. It's about two kiwi's who move to New York City to make it big. They sing. Man alive do they sing! They will be walking down the street and start singing, they'll be having sex... while singing, they're lives are filled with song.

Watching this show makes me want to break into tune at a moments notice. I want to be in the middle of giving my patient a bedbath and break into tune. I want to be loading the dishwasher and do a little ditty. I want to live in a state of music. The only problem is that I really can't sing, but I won't let that to stop me. Let me sing in my off tuned, small range voice. Let me sing loud and off key. Let us all sing...

...and it begins...

So, I'm entering the world of blogging. I'll be honest, I'm nervous. Thoughts go racing through my brain:

• Will people read this?
• Will they like it?
• Is it supposed to be humorous... all the time?
• What if I start this like many other diaries of my life? I'll do great for a few days, maybe even weeks, then I'll set it aside like last week's obit page?
• Have I always been this worried what people think, or for that matter, what I think?
• Have I had enough water to drink tonight?
• Did I pee yet tonight?

Yet, here I go... taking that first step into Blogging eternity. My thoughts logged onto the WORLD WIDE WEB!

I wonder why I've decided now, at 0445, on a work night to start. Maybe I just hope to provide a little smile now and again to my friends and family (maybe even strangers) to those who read this. Maybe because it's FINALLY a slow night (which never happens anymore) and I'm bored. Yet so excited to ready other people's blogs. so, I'm jealous I don't have my own... NOT ANYMORE!

I AM A BLOGGER. I AM PROUD. my new mantra... if I repeat it enough... I'll beleive!